David Fincher ‘Asped’ to Direct ‘Cleopatra’

Get it? 'Asped?' Come on, THAT'S funny. Geez, read a history book sometime...

William Bibbianiby William Bibbiani

David Fincher 'Asped' to Direct 'Cleopatra'

When adjusted for inflation, the Elizabeth Taylor version of Cleopatra cost about $300 million, and didn’t so much as break even for six years. Time for a remake! Oh, Hollywood… Will you never learn? Actually, Hollywood’s had a hankering for a new, feminist take on Cleopatra for years now: Angelina Jolie is always in talks to star, and even the mighty James Cameron was considering the project before agreeing to make Avatar 2 and instead, presumably because money is awesome. But Cleopatra isn’t rolling back up in the carpet yet: Deadline reports that Sony Pictures are in talks with The Social Network director David Fincher for the project.

If we’re being honest, David Fincher’s Cleopatra would probably be one hell of a project but we just can’t see this sucker getting made any time soon. Angelina Jolie’s almost as old as Cleopatra was when she died, let alone when she did all of her best work, and popular consensus is that no other female star as the wattage to open a historical epic like this. (Let’s be honest: even Angelina Jolie doesn’t. Remember Alexander? Nope, neither do we.) Fincher may or may not be seriously interested in the project but he’s got a lot on his plate right now already, what with Stieg Larsson’s Millenium Trilogy already underway and his previous commitment to direct that 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea project that nobody’s talking about.

Here’s a suggestion: remake Cleopatra 2525 instead. Come on, Hollywood… Give us what we really want!


Crave Online will be back with more Cleopatra news as it breaks (even, six years later).